Before I tell you what the object is....let me show you a photo. And then feel free to guess its identity (or select from the multiple choice options below). First a close up shot:
Now for the multiple choice quiz. Is this:
a) The remains of the giant alpaca K and I were trying, unsuccessfully, to raise in our back yard
b) A monster dust bunny
c) My failed attempt at knitting K a birthday sweater
d) K's old Marie Antoinette-style wig (from his drag queen days, of course)
e) None of the above
Before I reveal the true nature of this mystery item, let me show you yet another photo...this time to allow for proper perspective.
Truth, my friends, is stranger than fiction.This afternoon I decided to sweep our garage (alert the media). Perhaps, in the above photo, you noticed the tiny dog door close to the pile on the ground? Well, we have pugs. Two of them. But only one of them really sheds. That would be Lucie. And this pile, my friends, belongs to her. God help me but I am STILL trying to figure out how on earth Lucie could possibly shed this much frigging hair in the span of just a few weeks!! For the record, this pile of dog hair is actually bigger than she is. Where the fuck is it coming from?!?! And when will it stop?!
Now a funny aside. Martha, the nice gal who cleans our house twice a month, came over today. She walked into the garage to get the cleaning supplies. And then I heard a sharp cry, as if she'd been bitten...or, more likely, received the shock of her life. I darted across the living room and into the garage and caught her staring in horror at the giant hair pile from hell. I'd left it next to the mop bucket and and completely forgotten about it due to some other distraction. Poor Martha!
A word to the wise: pugs are cute, pugs are fun, but pugs (in particular the fawn ones) are NOT for neat freaks or people with allergies.
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