Suburban Survival 101

Last week I read one of those rare books that completely changed my perspective. It also scared the living shit out of me. And then gave me the motivation I needed to make a few changes. But first, the book.

Neil Strauss's, Emergency: This Book Will Save Your Life--which I'd heard about via the Amazon monthly book recommendation list--was both less and more than I expected. Since my intention in this post isn't to do a full book review, I'll simply say what started out as one of those "urban hipster decides to do something different and slightly wacky for a year of his life and then write a funny yet oddly moving story about it" books rapidly, after the first few chapters, turned into a serious, if utterly paranoid, survival manual. Thankfully it also never quite managed to lose its humorous, self-mocking tone. If you're interested, you can find out a lot more about the book and the author here. (Oh, and btw, I feel compelled to mention there is one animal death in the book. If it makes you feel any better, the author felt, and likely still feels, tremendously bad about it).

Now onto my post.

I live in earthquake country. You may live in tornado alley. Or a flood zone. Or be intimately familiar with the sound of tsunami sirens....or the sight of giant plumes of smoke from annual summer fires (or, God forbid, a volcano). Whatever the natural disaster, we humans and the creatures with whom we share our planet are incredibly vulnerable to the elements.

We're also incredibly vulnerable to the insanities of our fellow humans in the form of terrorists, lone gunmen, and the like.

I know some of this stuff could happen to me. And, as in the case of the next big earthquake, I am pretty sure it will happen to me...unless I move. But aside from owning a now expired fire extinguisher and a two-year old family earthquake kit, I and my family are SO not prepared to meet the next disaster. Were San Jose to be struck by a ginormous quake this very moment and were it as catastrophic as all the scientists are predicting, we, barring some incredibly good luck, would be screwed. Royally.

Which is why the Neil Strauss book was such a God-send for me. I may not be interested in learning how to live off the land (which he does), kill for food (which he, reluctantly, does), evade and escape capture (which he does). Nor have I even remotely achieved his level of paranoia. But I'd sure as hell like to know the bare minimum of what my family should do in the event of a wide-scale emergency a la Katrina or the L.A. riots. Since, let's be honest, there is only so much running and screaming one can accomplish after the shit hits the fan.

If you don't have time to read Strauss's book or it's just not your bag, here's some food for thought...and a few things you might want to consider so you too can be prepared for the big What If:

1) In the U.S., the government and all statewide emergency support agencies operate by the three-day rule. What does this mean for you and I? ALL citizens should be prepared, in the event of an emergency, to subsist for up to three full days without the help of governmental emergency relief. Period. In other words, each of us should have three-days worth of food, water, shelter, and basic first-aid training to take care of ourselves and our families with no outside help. This isn't to say emergency relief won't try to help you...but given the travesty of Katrina, I think it's best to assume you won't get help immediately and should be as prepared as possible.

2) On that note, there is a statewide program, CERT that anyone can participate in. The fees are relatively low ($40 in my area) and last 20 hours over a period of one to two weeks. CERT, which stands for Community Emergency Response Team, was originally founded by the LAFD in an effort to keep the community as prepared as possible in the event of a large-scale quake. The feds took note of the program's success and decided to implement it across the nation. Most communities offer some form of CERT course. You can, if you choose, take the longer course to become a certified CERT member (and get a nifty jacket to wear) or attend a free two-hour course to give you the bare bones info you need to stay prepared. CERT doesn't just prep for natural disasters, it also preps for manmade disasters and provides key training in first-aid, how to handle hazardous materials, search and rescue, and more.

3) In the event of a disaster, you may very well be called on to provide some form of CPR and/or first aid to a family member or neighbor. While the CERT program covers some of this, it really only gives you the CliffsNotes version which may or may not be enough. I recommend you consider signing up for your local Red Cross's CPR and first aid courses. And if you have kids (or are thinking about it), definitely consider taking an infant and child CPR class. (For you pet lovers out there, they also offer a pet first aid course!)

4) If you live in a natural disaster zone, your local Red Cross or city government web site will most certainly have basic info on what you need to do to prepare your household for an emergency (in terms of supplies to purchase, immediate steps to take during and after said emergency, escape route and meeting point planning, etc). For those of you in earthquake country, this site has loads of info.

5) In the event of an earthquake, do NOT run and stand in the nearest doorway of your home. This, in spite of all the advice to the contrary, is likely to get you seriously injured or killed. Instead, go immediately to the nearest big table, crawl under, and assume a fetal position. If the only big table in your home or office happens to be near a big window (as it does in my house), be sure your back is to the window.