Job Hunting: The Passive Aggressive Way

Here's the deal. Aside from a few freelance writing/editing gigs, I am jobless (muchas gracias Yahoo!). And even though my husband and I decided it probably made sense for me to stay home with baby #2 for the first year, I still feel compelled to go online and look for work. So every morning while feeding Z her bottle, I log on and visit HotJobs, Monster, Craigslist, and LinkedIn (in that order) in the hopes that I'll spot the job of my dreams.

At least once or twice a week I will halfheartedly submit a resume and then regret doing so due to "what if?" anxiety (what if they call? what if I need to find childcare ASAP? what if they want me to interview? I have nothing to wear! I don't know the first thing about database technology! why oh why did I bother to submit my resume in the first place!?!) You get my drift. The good news? I rarely have to deal with my fears because I rarely get a phone call.

But there are some exceptions. Case in point: a few weeks ago I was contacted by a recruiter for a company who will remain unnamed. The position sounded like it had been tailor made for me. "...content/copy writer and editor....mid-sized technology company....pay commiserate w/experience....excellent benefits..." I was ecstatic, nervous (the litany of "what ifs" began doing a rapid flamenco in my brain), and for the first time in a while, seriously considering going back to a full-time job. I returned the recruiter's call and submitted my resume/cover letter for his inspection. All seemed to be going well. I waited, waited, waited, checked my voice mail, checked my email, waited. In a rare burst of initiative, I called the recruiter a second time and left a voice mail. And....nothing.

From time to time I still wonder what happened. He'd seen my resume on LinkedIn so it can't have been that. My cover letter is relatively innocuous and not likely to inspire sudden distaste in a prospective employer. Did he make a mistake? Had the job, unbeknownst to him, already been filled? Had he been made redundant mere minutes after our first phone call? Been abducted by aliens? Found Jesus? WTF?! Call me you bastard!! CALL MEEEEEEE!