In which I fantasize about a multi-family vacation

If you read this post...and this one...you'll (rightly) guess I've got vacations on the brain. In the past, pre-layoff and small children, this is the time of year when K and I would typically head off to warmer climes for a long weekend or week. I looked forward to these little trips partly for the tropical drinks, azure waters, and endless beach activities. But also simply for the opportunity to get out of Dodge for a while and disconnect from the rat race back home.

Last year, when we decided to stop off in St. Thomas for several days (on our way to Ireland), we were accompanied by Miss M. It wasn't the first time we'd vacationed with her but it was the first time we'd done so without any grandparents or extended family around to help out. We had a great time but it wasn't exactly the relaxing idyll I'd had in mind.

Of course I realize we were lucky to go to St. Thomas at all. And it was a fabulous trip. But the truth is, unless you can drop the kiddies off with someone else, vacations take on a whole new look and feel. Gone are the endless days of relaxing on a beach with a good book or staying out late at a gourmet restaurant. No more serene boutique hotels with gorgeous views and spa visits.

Now, if you are lucky enough to go on a vacation at all, it's more likely to take place at a family resort (a la Beaches or, in my opinion, the much classier Club Med or anything from the Marriott chain). And it generally means you will be up at the crack of dawn for buffet breakfast, hanging out in your hotel room for at least 1.5 hours while the kiddies nap, off to an early dinner, and in bed typically no later than 10:00pm. If your kids are under five, you can pretty much kiss most tours or water activities (aside from swimming, paddleboating, or snorkeling) goodbye. Oh, and we haven't even discussed the thrill of a 4+ hour flight with small children.

So I'm beginning to think the key to having an enjoyable vacation with kids is to go with another family or group of families. It makes sense. The kids can generally keep themselves entertained for a few hours while the adults have some semblance of relaxation under the beach umbrella. And there are enough adults around to tag team the little ones as needed. So maybe the parents of each family rotate care duties so each couple has a chance to go off solo for a day. And let's face it...when the inevitable meltdowns come, they'll be SO much easier to cope with when you are surrounded by friends who can help you laugh it off.

Also, in this day and age of crap economic times and tight budgets...vacationing with other people can help cut costs dramatically. Many resorts offer package deals to groups. It's a lot easier to rent a cool beach house when you pool together your resources. And some vacations...like say renting a houseboat on Lake Mead...are best done in groups.

But here's the problem. How the hell do you organize something like this? Given most parents work and have limited vacation time....and generally use that time to visit family on the other side of the country....how do two or more families pull this off? And more importantly, how do you convince others to join you? I suspect most people would be slightly worried about being stuck with another family for more than a few days. The truth is, people who you like in relatively short doses could, unexpectedly, turn into major pains in the ass over a series of days.

Has anyone else vacationed with another (non-blood tie) family? If so, how did you make it work? Or did it? Do tell.