Single Sex Eucation: A Good Idea?

When I was a tween and a teen, I think I would have balked if my parents wanted to send me to an all-girls school. Can you blame me? Where's the fun and the drama (aside from the obvious clique-related activities)? You need boys to spice things up. Then again, maybe I wouldn't have minded so much. P.E. was bad enough before it was co-ed. But when they added boys to the mix, it truly became a special brand of hell for me. And some of my most embarassing school moments (in fact almost ALL of them) involved boys.

So now that I'm a parent of two girls, I'm having second thoughts about the whole co-ed vs. all girls' school thing. The fact is, plenty of research shows single-sex education may have an edge over co-ed, at least when it comes to girls.

Last year, I read this book about girls' tween and early teen years. It was an incredibly emotional experience for me. Finally someone copped on to the huge challenges girls face when they hit pre- and early adolescence. I experienced it first hand and can tell you I'm living proof that female self-confidence takes a big hit during the middle school years. Granted, we moved smack in the middle of 7th grade...and that didn't help. But I can honestly say it wasn't until my early 30s that my self confidence rose back to its pre-adolescent levels. I think books like the aforementioned (and this) should be mandatory reading for anyone (mom or dad) parenting a girl.

The fact remains, while females and males have a tremendous amount in common....they also have some very significant differences (aside from the physical stuff). Knowing this, I can see the challenges and disadvantages inherent in trying to educate boys and girls in the same classroom. In fact, the more I read about it, the more I feel the urge to smack my forhead and say stupid things like, "why the hell didn't someone think of this sooner?!" I suspect the different learning styles really begin to diverge just before and during puberty for both sexes. But there are some K-8th grade schools (this one is not far from our house) who see the value of keeping schools co-ed but with the sexes separated into single-sex classrooms.

I think my personal take--so far--is all-girls schools are beneficial primarily in early puberty and beyond. I suspect the whole co-ed thing isn't as big a deal in elementary school although there are some who disagree. Personally, I think at some stage or another, it's good for boys and girls to mix and mingle. It teaches them a few crucial things about the opposite sex. And there are skills and attitudes each sex has that the other might benefit from (Girls are, as a rule, more focused, calm, and communicative than boys in the early years. Boys are, as a rule, more physically active, assertive, and direct that girls in the early years). That said, co-education has been going on for years yet men and women don't seem to have figured one another out in any crucial way as a result of it. Otherwise, why the popularity of books and movies like this?

K and I are already wailing and gnashing our teeth at the cost of private schools. The public schools in our area aren't dismal but they aren't as stellar as some in neighboring towns (Cupertino, Los Altos). Recently, I was excited to find an all-girls middle school located about 15 miles from our home. And there are two reputable all-girls highschools in San Jose, one just a few minutes from our house. Maybe we could send both girls to public elementary school and then, starting in 6th grade, move them into an all-girls environment. That's certainly solve the money thing for the short-term.

Anyway, this is still a work-in-progress for me. We have plenty of time before we need to start worrying 24/7 about puberty. But I'm also of the mind that the more you know, the less surprises you face when the time come. Knowledge is power, as they say.*

*Actually, Sir Francis Bacon said that one.

P.S. This is only peripherally related to the post above but I thought it was interesting nonetheless.